Speaker 1: 0:00

I'm in an office every day. There's no windows in my office. I'm working just as hard as someone with a corporate job. I'm over-scheduled, I'm over-social, I'm over, over, over, over doing it and even though I'm doing alternative, great work here, I am working like a man. I have an autoimmune disorder. I'm exhausted. What is all of this for? All this healing? For, if this is the way that I feel? So I moved to Bali and I started, unknowingly, this nomadic life which I didn't know at the time I was going to do. But I went on pilgrimages in the South of France and Portugal and Bali. I went all over the world walking the path of the divine feminine and learning what that meant. And Bali really helped me grow into a softening and opening and a harmonization of my masculine and my feminine, and from that place I felt like I've got to share something more.

Speaker 2: 0:52

Welcome to the Whole Shebang. I'm Jen.

Speaker 1: 0:54

Briggs, your host.

Speaker 2: 0:55

Let me tell you what you're in for here. Many of us have been running at breakneck speed, functioning mostly in our heads, and we've suffered from disconnection, burnout and lost passions. I believe it's because we functioned in part and not in whole. So we're exploring a new path, embracing intuition, creativity, playfulness and connection in all of life. It's vibrant, powerful and magnetic. So come on with me and buckle up Buttercups. We're diving in. I have a treat for you today. I cannot wait for you to listen.

Speaker 2: 1:27

Alana Warlup is the guest and she showed up with just this beautiful love, energy and transmission. It's conversations like this, quite honestly, that when I started the podcast I was dreaming of, where we'd hear from women, from people that have been working and grinding and have followed their intuition on a really unique path, and hers led her down the path of the divine feminine. She shares so much of her journey that I think you're going to relate to, along with how she's grounding and integrating those truths and those softness, ancient goddess, archetypes and all of that. How she's pulling that into modern day, real life. It's really beautiful. Let me tell you a little bit about her.

Speaker 2: 2:08

Alana Warlup is an international teacher who facilitates healing through her work as a spiritual psychotherapist, trauma specialist, intuitive and transformational coach, her passion is to teach the art of embodiment and devotion to self and spirit through powerful healing practices. Being galactic and grounded, she will bring in the beautiful light of ascension. Working with spirit, the unseen realm, the intelligence of your intuition, blended with a healthy dose of nerdy emotional biohacking, somatic trauma release, transpersonal psychology and energy mastery techniques. Psychology and energy mastery techniques. Yeah, yeah, you heard all that right. I told you you're in for a treat. Buckle up, enjoy, loves. Alana, thank you so much for joining me. Welcome to the whole shebang. Yes.

Speaker 3: 2:58

I'm so excited to be here.

Speaker 2: 3:01

There are so many things. I've been taking notes since we first chatted and, um, doing a little bit of digging into your work and very transparently was like in and out of sleep this morning. Like what am I? What is the first question that I'm going to? What is it?

Speaker 1: 3:33

What have we forgotten? Oh gosh, that just gave me chills. And it's such a big answer because so often we are in this process of talking about and trying to understand the remembering. So when we talk about the remembering, you know, there's this implication of what was forgotten and when that the reorientation to the blueprint of love. I think the blueprint of love is essentially what we have come here to forget, to remember.

Speaker 2: 4:51

That is so beautiful. There's so much there. Um connection to what?

Speaker 1: 5:00

Mm, source ourselves, love, infinite intelligence, the, the cosmos, the earth, right, like they're all different names, they're all different faces of the same essence that we try to encapsulate with words, but yet we cannot.

Speaker 1: 5:20

Right, like it's, it's the, the ineffable experience of a field and that, like even us humans, we're trying so hard with a brain to make it a concept, and yet it's so beyond even a concept, right, right, so how it's like, how can we give ourselves these glimpses of experiences of that?

Speaker 1: 6:10

You know that that has many names, right, that love source, divine frequency, that God force, that you know, and in that like, when we're connected to that like again, I can't even use like words are so limiting, I am that right, and when I remember that it's, it's like I connected into knowing the most basic thing that we should know. You know that, that we are the field I mean it's this philosophical, like boomerang kind of fractal field when we start to try to, like you know, give um substance to it and, and of course I want to make it like, we try and make it tangible and accessible. So we have to use words and logic and our mind to wrap around a concept that we couldn't possibly understand in its totality. But it's all that. We are right, it's love connected to love.

Speaker 2: 6:59

Yeah, okay, I love this. I love, love, love, love. And it's so deep. Now I want to go, I want to zoom way back, if you're cool with this, and talk about, like, how your work and how you got into this, and then we're going to, we're going to thread this, we're going to thread this through, but, um, tell me a little bit about your journey and your work and how you, how you got here to love.

Speaker 1: 7:25

Yeah, amazing. I um I started honestly when I was quite young um, my father had a little bit of a midlife crisis slash awakening and he started bringing meditation and yoga and this was like in the eighties, where we were doing like yoga to a VHS video with like a dude with two ballerina dancers and leotards, like next to him, and it was this thing called yoga and we would do it in the basement. Um, and like I started getting a sense of you know, like this energy and talking to things and I always felt a different field, um, and I had, uh, a little awakening, not a little awakening.

Speaker 1: 8:11

Another big awakening, um, when I was in a Episcopalian student run all kid run like church group weekend thing, that I wasn't even a part of their group, but I somehow got invited and went and for the first time I stood in front of a crowd of people and I bawled my eyes out because of the experience of love pulsating through my body. I was seeing in like technicolor. I was feeling God's source in me. All I could do was cry. It was just tears of like, oh my God, I think I understand what they're talking about in church. I think I understand why I'm here and all I want to do for the rest of my life is find this, understand this, live this.

Speaker 1: 9:08

And so I was 14. So, yeah, it was cool, it was, it was a good 14 life changing experience. But I just like could understand energy and you know, and and I always felt a little. You know, obviously so many of us feel very odd and different and when we're into things that are not what other people are talking about. But that kind of sent me on a trajectory and I started studying Reiki when I was in high school and again the internet didn't exist, like phones didn't exist, like I just found a flyer and I asked my mom if I could borrow the car and go.

Speaker 1: 9:46

I don't know why she let me, but she did, um and I I studied, you know, reiki, cause that was what I had heard of or knew, and um got to have these really crazy cool experiences. Like the right mentors came in at the right time to help show me this world of being a healer and eventually, you know, with some majorly traumatic experiences in between that help accelerate that path. Losing my father at a young age, having an abusive relationship, like these things that sort of fortify your soul and, you know, make you course correct and say, like, what is life about? Why am I actually here? Like who can, who can feel this amount of pain and survive, you know? And so my faith and my understanding of of the universe was really helpful.

Speaker 1: 10:42

But that didn't. I didn't at that time understand how to emotionally process things like what 17 year old does, right, you know, or, however, 17, 18 year old, and so I I kind of covered up a lot, um, through my belief system, like I'm good, it was all happening for a reason, trust the universe, and I went and I kind of numbed out with that as my shield, right, so everyone thought I was okay and in the meantime I I was very numb underneath and man, like I could have. I was having a great time, had a great life living in Aspen, colorado, like partying, seeing music, skiing every day, doing massage Like I was great, you know it looked amazing from the outside.

Speaker 1: 11:35

And then I hit a breaking point and um and I, I went to um Naropa university to get my master's in transpersonal psychology and I had felt really drawn to go do that. And that was in my later 20s, after college and such, and I remember thinking like everything has to change in this moment. I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years. I moved from Aspen. I was so uncomfortable with this, like the everyone expecting me to get married and expecting me to just stay in Aspen and live this life, and I was going insane like a caged bird and the thing was like I hadn't felt all that was there and I was seeking and it was uncomfortable and I could have just kept going, but I was turning into this person who was starting to poke, get angry, and I wasn't the partner I wanted to be. And, um, I knew that something like Naropa had some thing for me there and so it is. It's like you know, I went to this Buddhist school that is all about therapy every day, all the time, in all the ways, and meditation and Buddhism and gestalt and transpersonal and somatic. And you know, for three years I I had a meltdown, a complete breakdown there, pretty much Um, and realized that I mean, I had never really felt my feelings. I didn't know what it meant to feel feelings but like you don't know that you're numb until you start to feel again. And when you start to feel that spiritual awakening of having to feel all the pain, man, that's true, right, like you have got to die to your pain and be in it and feel it all and you need to be held in that experience.

Speaker 1: 13:28

I was lucky enough to get to do that in a really tight container where I was learning about it. I had teachers, I had students, we were all always holding each other in that space and then from there after that having a private practice and I was teaching Kundalini yoga. I was doing all these kind of alternative like Kundalini, you know, tantra, breathwork, and I was also looking at the way that people do therapy and was like you know that is also got to a point with me it felt really limited. I'm in an office every day. I'm. There's no windows in my office. I'm working just as hard as someone with a corporate job. I'm overscheduled, I'm over social, I'm over, over, over, over doing it and even though I'm doing alternative great work. Here I am working like a man I am not you know like, and that's what I then I, then I moved to Bali Right, and then I had this big you know pilgrimage around the divine feminine and I was like I'm, I have an auto immune disorder, I'm exhausted.

Speaker 1: 14:36

What is it? What is all of this? For all this healing? For if this is the way that I feel, right, you know, and then I, I drastically again, I just have this karma for being able to blow up my life and start again. I think it's exciting. So I, I moved to Bali and I started this, you know, unknowingly, this nomadic life which I didn't know at the time I was going to do.

Speaker 1: 15:00

But I went on pilgrimages in the South of France and Portugal and Bali you know, like I went all over the world like walking the path of the divine feminine and learning what that meant. And Bali really helped me grow into a softening and opening and a harmonization of my masculine and my feminine, and from that place I felt like I've got to share something more, like there's more. It's not just therapy, it's not just um breath work, it's not just this, it's not numbing out and and and God. Most people just don't understand the basic thing that they don't actually really access feeling, their feelings. And you can't, you can, you're going to limit your growth of consciousness and your spiritual growth when you cannot be so fully deeply in your body and safe there, safely emotionally in your body Right. And so I created a whole system and program that has all the components of it's mystical, it's magical, it's connected to source, it's being a priestess, it's being an emotionally mature and masterful human being, emotionally mature and masterful human being.

Speaker 3: 16:29

But, like it's like everything you didn't learn how to do, I was like, well, shit, I learned the hard way. So here.

Speaker 1: 16:34

Let me try to piece all this together. And then I mostly work and I shut my practice down to men when I went on my divine feminine pilgrimage and I realized working with women for now, for that period of time, was my calling and knowing how to combine these altered states like the feminine state, the masculine state, how we, how we work with both Right and so that sort of brings me to, like you know, I've got lots of kind of branches of the business and how I express that with people. But um, that's my, my long story.

Speaker 2: 17:12

So beautiful and I I mean none of us are the center of the universe, right? But, like I sometimes think I am, I was thinking, thinking back to the journey that I've been on and when I started, just like scratching the surface, I didn't even have the words divine, feminine, but was like, right, the universe was uncovering it with me, for me, whatever, and literally thought no one. I thought no one was talking about it. I thought I thought I was like crazy. I was like what is this? And then to stumble into these things, but so just everything you just shared is just like, oh, it's so beautiful to know, um how deep and timeless these truths are and how how the universe is just um, doing what it does in people without us trying to have it happen. Right, it's just happening.

Speaker 2: 18:12

But one of the things you said if you don't mind, I'd like to come back to, because I think that this is a piece that weaves through is that the, the not feeling our pain and not being embodied, not being in our bodies. And I was, as you were, kind of sharing your experience in your story of when you started to feel the pain. I'm, I'm curious if there was like a moment or a specific memory or a time when you first were like, oh, here we go, like here's. Here's how I'm starting to feel now and here's how I'm like. What did it feel like to open up, or was there a moment that you made the choice to be open, or what was that like?

Speaker 1: 18:54

There's actually. I mean, sometimes I really don't have like, oh, that was this specific moment. But, as you're speaking, I really have a pretty pinnacle moment and story around that. And I was, I was at Naropa and I think in my second year or something like that. Oh no, it was my, it was.

Speaker 1: 19:11

It was when I first got there, um, because I was just going through my breakup at the same time as starting through um, through that that time, and we had a psychodrama play out and the first thing that you do is pick up a color scarf that represents your mood and I was like black boom and then tie it around your body where you feel that, around my heart. And I was just like boom, black around my heart. I felt, you know, I was just in a kind of depression that day, um, and then I I quickly look around and I see everybody with red and yellow and orange like on their hair and I was just like, oh my God, I'm going to be the person that it like she's trying to identify like who's who's got the biggest issue right now.

Speaker 3: 19:59

I think I just red flagged myself.

Speaker 2: 20:02

Oh, my God, it's me. I just would have tried to flag on me.

Speaker 3: 20:05

I wouldn't have done it. I wouldn't have done it if I had known we were going to like do a whole psychodrama.

Speaker 1: 20:09

So then I became the center of the psychodrama and then in psychodrama everyone around plays a part in your story and this then you act out, kind of the story, and it becomes this living ecology of your struggle. Or you know your, your, you know transformation, essentially, but you you need to play it out and talk to the different parts. So then people were assigned roles your Alana's father, your Alana's boyfriend, so and then that kind of grows as, like, you're discovering what it is. So I went through this and I remember feeling mortified that I was the one that had that, was had the problem mortified and I was like so resistant, yet I knew I'm like I'm in freaking school for therapy, I've got to do this, I've got to be this about here.

Speaker 3: 21:05

You know, I know I'm like, but my whole body was shaking and and I had to act this whole thing out.

Speaker 1: 21:13

And you know, it just came to this really pinnacle, beautiful, like breakthrough moment and I had that glitch going don't show your weak, don't cry in front of anybody, like you can't, they cannot see you be a mess. And yet all that was coming up and I could, I could feed it. It's like the you know, like I could have fed that energy. Or I could have just been like I'm good, like yeah, oh, I'm angry, you know. And I, I was like it's your choice in this moment, what do you want to do? I was like it's your choice in this moment. What do you want to do? Do you want to heal or do you want to stay hidden?

Speaker 1: 21:57

And I chose to be the mess to follow, like snotting, crying on myself, lose it, raging in the middle of the room in front of all my peers, and I was, at the same time, incredibly embarrassed and I knew I had to push through that shame of being in my emotion If I was going to finally heal from all of the suppressed emotion that I didn't think that I could feel right, the numbness, the don't show them.

Speaker 1: 22:21

Like you, it's unsafe to have feelings because you can't take up any space kind of thing, right, it's like it's gotta be about other people. Don't let them know that you're not okay, and all of that. So that that really was a choice point moment for me. That was like what are you going to do, alana? You're going to stay the same, you're going to stay set Like you have to be vulnerable. You have to learn how to be vulnerable in front of other people, because it's not working out that you're not. It is not working out. You know, I'm lonely in my relationship, I am lonely in love, I have a million friends and yet I feel lonely, right, like it is not working out. So, yeah, how beautiful.

Speaker 2: 23:07

Would you say that that? I mean, I'm thinking about this idea of connection, right Connection to self, connection to source, connection to otherness and, and what you were just speaking to in in loneliness, would you say that, um, softening to feeling is one of the keys to connection? Oh, that was a part of. Uh, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1: 23:36

Okay and no, I really truly believe that because you know, like it it's, it's again right, the micro is the macro. If I can connect within. The connection within is you being able to move into connection with sensation, emotion, feeling, vibration. And when we connect in and allow and accept and feel, then we move through that into another phase, which is the totality of all things, which is a spiritual experience. You will find connection to source through your emotions, not your thoughts, not whatever you think about them.

Speaker 1: 24:25

I am literally talking about the physical sensations and then the felt sense of them. What's the intuition, what's the message, what's the pain that's there? And then it comes alive and it speaks to you and you're shown something in this you know shamanic medicine, woman journey that you do with yourself and your own alchemy, with your emotions. That then takes you out into the cosmic connection and then you are source energy. So I feel like, when we can connect to spirit through our own body, through our own pain, through our own joy and pleasure, through sensation, then that is the ultimate mastery around connection. And when I'm connected to source, wow, like, can I connect with people, other people from that place? That's when it's powerful, that's when it's synchronistic, that's when it's meant for my soul and that's when I don't lose myself in other people's energy, that I can remain in this connection and be in relationship but not be, you know, manipulated or swayed or manipulated for the good or the bad in relationship.

Speaker 1: 25:42

I mean we manipulate for the good all the time, but it's like how do I stay in my own field?

Speaker 2: 26:09

Connected to myself, connected to source and connected to community Right. So I think that to I don't want to put words in your mouth, but like to awaken, right and to move into this um union of the sacred, feminine and masculine, and I would, I would love to dive into that a little bit further. Before we do, can we dive into a little bit more of the house? So if there's somebody listening and they're just like on the front end of the journey, or maybe they're like I was and you were and I'm still at some points for myself, that like in the masculine excuse me, and maybe not even a healthy masculine right, just like in this numb, not feeling, make it happen for a lot of people, I even think, survival mode. And what would you say to somebody that's maybe on the front edge of this journey that they're like, yeah, I'm choosing pain, choosing, I'm choosing to walk into this stuff that is hard and to start feeling, how else can they catalyze and and um step into that growth or that awakening?

Speaker 1: 27:10

Yeah, I mean there's, there's a lot that's there because, um, you know, first off, we were kind of, you know, speaking about the, the real meaning of the feminine and the masculine energy of, like you know, again, just labels. We can talk about them in many different ways. They're just very tangible labels to understand the nurturing, nourishing power that I have within me is the one that is the healer, it is the softness, is what we call the feminine right. And so what was pretty much beat out of us was to receive and give nurturing. I mean, actually, most of them, most people are pretty good at it but like to receive nurturing.

Speaker 1: 27:58

And so we have to learn how to be soft with ourself, quiet the inner critic. And how do we quiet the inner critic? We have to learn how to actually somatically feel safe in our body and relax. And then the critic was like, oh, okay, you know, like we're not like hitting the button all the time of the negative thinking where it's like pay attention, pay attention, you're going to get it wrong. You're going to. You know this person's going to hurt you, they're going to say something, maybe you won't be perfect, you're going to feel shame, so let's go, go, go, go. That's why we overdevelop that masculine you know, wounded masculine energy is because it's like it's actually kind of the wounded feminine but like coming up trying to be the protector because she doesn't feel safe. So we protect in these ways that are like I'm going to numb out and only let you in, this close, even though you think you're closer than me but you're not really that close to me, like you know, like I've got I'm, I've got the shield in here.

Speaker 3: 28:57

You play this part well, I know I kind of get it.

Speaker 2: 28:59

Okay.

Speaker 3: 29:02

Never done it myself. No, no, no, yeah, no me neither, yeah, totally.

Speaker 1: 29:07

But you know, and then it's like understanding that the armor can come down and the nurturing and the nourishing is actually our most accelerated way to healing. So for people to understand that intellectual concept first is a really good start, right? Not that they now need to become more feminine. You know, a lot of women come to me and they're like, oh, I'm in my masculine, I need to become more feminine, what should I do? And it's like I mean it will naturally happen as you soften and you become more of an attractor field for, like a, a nourishing space to be, your attractor field grows. This is true with men as well. When you are a safe place to be within yourself, you emanate safety to others and you become attractive. But you become magnetic, right and powerful. But the way in is through re-templating our feminine into caring, into gentleness, into you know, like a soft, a soft way of being.

Speaker 1: 30:27

I'm not saying that you all of a sudden are just, ah, this puddle that's so loving and like ah, you know, like and it's not my personality to be that way, you know it's like, it's, it's literally an inner game, it's a feeling, it's a sensation inside your body. It's really correlated with relaxation and relief. So, the more that we can practice the relief, relaxation, this, this very intangible concept of surrender, like, actually, like, what does it feel like to surrender? We literally, it's like falling back into the ocean and letting it catch us and floating on the surface and allowing our limbs to move and be soft and wave and right, like you just get this, like, ah, we're dropped in, we're aware of our five senses, we're sensorial, we're in the moment, we're enjoying that moment, even if it's painful. There's still this like, ah, like, let me breathe with it and be with it and feel it. Yeah, and so, like, even the voice I'm using and my, my, my movements and all of that.

Speaker 1: 31:49

That wasn't natural to me before. Right, like I've, I've literally had to like work on that and I, I would just lay in the ocean and nature, just, you know, if I can just lay in the ocean, because luckily I live near the ocean, I did it this morning how can, how deeply can I just surrender to the current and the wave and close my eyes and feel the sun and let the ocean rock me. How much can I let go of my head and, like you know, not, uh, I gotta hold it, I gotta hold it, I gotta hold it all together Um right.

Speaker 1: 32:29

So we're kind of doing the reverse, the inverse of what the body says that we should be doing all the time, which is, you know, protect, defend, achieve, protect, defend, achieve. This is your value. This is the way through and up and um and, and that has a place. I'm not saying it doesn't. It's just that when we're just completely overdeveloped in that hardened protective end defeat and we're really teeny underdeveloped in the nurture, nourish, surrender, because surrender equals trust. What's the base component of any good, healthy relationship Trust. I have to know how to trust myself and I have to actually know the mechanics of what that means.

Speaker 1: 33:14

So I know you're asking for something tangible and I hope that this is like it's great, it's kind of tangible, but the more that you intellectually understand something and your mind is like resonant, then it unlocks the mind and it allows the energy to flow through your body, like we need that, you know this, this little guy on board, so that we can take in a new flow of a frequency, of a different idea, of a different concept, of a of a different way of being, and that, that, that, hopefully, that frequency, that energy feels better than what you're doing now.

Speaker 2: 33:55

It feels the whole time you're talking it's like yeah, like yummy, I mean it feels it. To me it feels really good and I and it it didn't, I couldn't feel it before. Right, when you're numb, you're lacking the ability, I think, to really feel, but you were talking about even just your. I'm going to call it a practice this morning, in the ocean, of just like noticing the sun on your face and like the practice of tapping into the sensorial. I like that. I haven't heard anybody say it that way, because I say sensual and people go one direction with it, which is all good.

Speaker 2: 34:31

But but that idea of tapping into those the senses as a practice in any moment, that I think if we can savor those this is my experience at least, if I can savor any one moment. I keep using this example, like I was at the. I was at the grocery store like the whole foods and the peaches have been calling me. They're like so ripe right now, just beautiful peaches and just having like. I literally had a moment in the store where I'm like tearing up over the peaches because I, because I've been working on that idea of just actually surrendering to even those little moments of like, of gratitude for beautiful food. That is nourishing my body, right, and it seems so simple.

Speaker 2: 35:23

But when you were talking about this surrender and this idea that it doesn't, it doesn't mean that we're just like I'm going to use the word weak, you didn't use that word, but I think some women might feel that or be afraid of that title, goddess, because to me it, it, to me it communicates this beautiful blend of, of that sensuality and power, just like rawr. Can you talk a little bit about that? Or maybe this is a good place to segue into the modern day priestess and what that means. But how to. If we start to get to a place where we're open and we're softening, how then can we also tap into that the power?

Speaker 1: 36:42

That's a great thread. The goddess, the sage, the medicine woman, like all of these titles, are a way that we use energy with our mind, you know, like how our mind can wrap its brain around, an energy that we can embody, we can step into or we can step out of, we can harness it, we can let it go and be in a different state, but there are states of being the goddess, the priestess, and what I like to talk about in the, you know, in this realm of the divine feminine, is like we're using that as this practice of like transfiguration, right, we become something else and literally all it takes is my mind going. I'm going to be this now, like I'm going to be this energy. So in my chemistry, my biology, I've got to become something other than the vibration that I am at this moment in time. And when I think of a priestess, when I think of a goddess, and and it's I harness the energy of power and I harness the energy of the deep, mystical, wise, feminine, like an energy that is flowing through my vessel. It is not of this you know world, but it is. It is like something that I can channel into this world through my body, right, and that is like what we get to as awakened beings.

Speaker 1: 38:25

You know, the more again, the more we do our shadow work and our trauma work, and we look at that like the more we're able to surrender into an energy. And let that be us, let that be the my unique expression, which is very different than your unique expression and the person sitting next to me. We all have a different way that that wants to flow through us. But if my mind is in the way and thinking or judging, like criticizing or evaluating what I'm doing, then it's going to cut off my expression of this beautiful essence that wants to flow through. So, you know, I use trance states and channeled states and altered states of consciousness for healing. So it's like we're we're training how to use the mind to go into such deep states of surrender that I'm just letting the light flow through, that.

Speaker 1: 39:25

I'm just letting the goddess flow and she may want to scream and yell and like be on fire with anger for the world, and she might want to be like shooting love out of her heart and like pulling it back and like healing people with this light, you know, or whatever. It's just like people always come and they're they're asking like what is my, what is my purpose? How do I walk the divine feminine path? And it's like there's no answer. You have to harness, you have to. You have to be courageous enough to get your ego so fucking small and out of the way to be that love, to be that bold, to hold that level of love, that frequency of a higher love within you. And that is what you, your body, is made for, that is what you are tuned for. But we have to train for that right. We train our nervous system, and our nervous system ain't so good with a whole bunch of repressed trauma in it.

Speaker 3: 40:29

So step one, that's where we work right. Step two we start.

Speaker 2: 40:34

You mean I don't get to jump straight to. Goddess Girl, you can't be a mermaid yet.

Speaker 3: 40:41

I know you can, but, but you know it's a good point, because some people do try to skip it.

Speaker 1: 40:51

They use altered states to skip the the reality of the pain that their body and their life is in, their life could be, you know, a little bit shambly a little bit. You know, uh, not aligned, not making money, not being able to, you know, hold a job or whatever, and then they're just shifting off into altered realms.

Speaker 1: 41:12

That's just disassociation in in my, in my book anyway like you might be the best channel in the world, but when you're starting the channel through the filter of, uh, unhealed trauma, then we've got unhealed healers healing other people and projecting their trauma out on them. It's a problem, Big one these days, because many people are. We've got a lot of accelerated access to accelerated substances. Now, right, We've got all the medicines, we've got the breath work and, like, I love all that stuff, Love it. But people who use it to be in the state and then keep using it to go back to the state, back to the state, back to the stakes. I think the answer is up there and they're not coming down and really working on the shadow that that state is pointing out. You know, then it's like an addiction to a state that they can't make. They can't create that themselves.

Speaker 3: 42:12

You've got to be able to be the medicine, Like I am this body is a medicine, right Like I can take myself on a journey anytime, through my breath, through my, through my focus Right.

Speaker 1: 42:25

Like you know, like it's it's. We have crystalline bodies of light. Let's use those Right. So you know, all the things are are are great and helpful and setting templates for things that we need to. You know, our brain oftentimes needs to know that there's a path to get to these altered states of, like you know, expansion. But then we're good, we've got the map. Let's practice daily, daily practice on how to get there and and harness and direct energy in a, in a yeah, in a, in a way that has, uh, I guess, like I want to say, a lineage, like a way that has a system that has been proven over time to work Right.

Speaker 2: 43:14

So can we talk about some of the ways, so altered states of consciousness, to access the access, the template I can't remember the word you said and then coming back into our body and working, working with the shadow. Work. Do we find the shadow in the altered state of consciousness is maybe where it's going with this, like, what do we find in the altered state of consciousness and then how do we bring it back?

Speaker 1: 43:42

Yeah, Cool, great. What you will find in your daily life and your very waking life pretty much every day are triggers. You will find triggers every day, almost right. They might be little, they might be big, they might be just annoyed or, you know, tested, or a little poke of anger, a little you know, or straight up you know, like I'm losing my shit and I'm angry. I'm really sad, I'm really hurt disproportionately for what just happened, right? So the trigger is the way that we start to then be like Ooh, okay, something's here.

Speaker 1: 44:20

And then, if we can't access it because oftentimes we cannot, because our primal brain comes in and shuts down our ability to access anything deeper than the trigger, because it thinks that if we actually experience what's beneath the trigger, that will perish, that will die, that will. The stories that we tell ourselves are true. We are hopeless, we are helpless, we are worthless, right. So it's so afraid of that feeling worthless, rejected, abandoned, shame that it will, it won't give you. It's like access denied to any of the feelings. So a lot of times people are like I want to feel, I want to do this, and I can't get there, and that was me for a long time. I'm like I let's do it, but, like I, literally cannot feel the thing Right. So that's why, you know, one of those ways is practicing the felt sense. We have to learn how to actually really focus into our body and be able to safely go in and navigate physical sensations that then, you know, show us emotion and sensation, like memory and stuckness, stuck energy, and then we float into a place that is unity, right. So that's sort of the system, that is the altered state. So at times we might need an accelerator, which is, you know, what I call accelerators, right, so they're, they're kind of bridges to walk from conscious, waking mind into the trap door. Trap door, like that thing is sealed, shut, right.

Speaker 1: 45:59

Sometimes we need a little guidance on how to open that door and feel the feelings that are there and and and get some access to what's usually like denied access. And it's the more that we do it, the more that we practice it in a safe, guided container and way, then the more the brain can understand that that's okay, what happens when we go there is safe and and it's okay and nothing bad happens and we don't die or we're not actually worthless on the other side, that we, we, we can transmute what's there If, again, with the with, with guidance and knowing how to do that, right, um, and then we start to have, you know, neural connections. It's like, oh, they start to like, uh, joe, dispense a fire and wire together, right, so then they're, they're starting to say that place isn't so scary and I know what's going on when I access it, and then I can come back and then my triggers start to become less and less right, they start to deactivate because we can access the feeling, let the feeling go, almost like a purge, like you have all this stored up energy, emotion, charge in your body from all these past micro traumas, big traumas, stresses, misperceptions of the world, like distorted beliefs, right. And so they're all like stuck in, you know charges, they, they keep playing out in patterns, they're in our body, they're in our injuries, they're in chronic illness, right.

Speaker 1: 47:38

So the more that we can safely walk the path into them, into those charges, and discharge the nervous system, then the whole pressure system comes down and you don't get triggered as much, you're calmer, you're more relaxed. You're not like a sensitive, right, when people call you like the bad, the bad kind of sensitive, like she was sensitive, you know, like the one that you were like oh no, I am like, I don't like you, like the, the kind that you take everything personally, right, you stop taking life personally and you realize, like actually nothing's personal, like, yeah, I mean, man, really nothing is personal, right, we're just trying to love each other.

Speaker 1: 48:27

We really are most of the time, you know, but it's like the deep wound can come out and really mess that up. But yeah, so that's a little um idea or or again like the theory behind, like what, what are we doing as we navigate both spaces? You know, like, how do we draw from that? And then, and then come back and meditation, breath work, visualization, trance, states, chanting. You know, like, when we, when we know what we're doing, when we're trying to work with your trauma right Cause I'm a trauma specialist and so it's like we've got to actually light up the brain that wants to change, the part of the brain that actually, like wants to change.

Speaker 1: 49:11

When we have trauma, the part of our brain that was traumatized and holding that memory is cut off from, from getting oxygen and and blood flow to it a different experience, but that one has to be activated first and then we overlay a different experience. So there's a nuance to that, right, there's there's working with with people who know what they're doing, and I'd say that just because there's a lot of this circus kind of you know just there's a lot going on in the healing reality and, like I said, there's a lot of unhealed people trying to heal people with literally no education on how to do that. I'm not saying like you're not going to have a healing experience with someone that's so just lovingly holding space. That's totally possible. But if you're really looking to do this work, like you know, make sure someone kind of actually knows what they're doing.

Speaker 2: 50:06

I'm just going to say that Find someone that knows what they're doing. Yeah, that's a good, that's a good place to start.

Speaker 3: 50:14

I live in Bali, so it's like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2: 50:19

Yeah, no, I. I don't know if this is a collective theme that's surfacing, but you're not the first one recently that said that to me. That's in the space that is getting I'm going to use. I'm not I'm not saying this that you're feeling this way, but the sense I was getting, particularly from this other individual, was that there was a lot of frustration there because, because they're seeing people that aren't healed, healing people and or people having these, these experiences are going off into altered state of consciousness and then not really doing anything with it, not really bringing it back to grant to the ground, to life, to know what to do with it. So that it feels relevant that we're talking about this right now.

Speaker 1: 50:59

Yeah, yeah, and I'm not ever projecting that like we all need to be healed, like that's. You know there's no end game to that. But just when someone doesn't have the awareness of their projecting their own trauma through their healing, which is, you know, it takes a high amount of accountability and self-responsibility and authority to know that. And so most people when they're kind of starting out, don't have that awareness and that can be re-traumatizing along the way. And it's the same with a lot of the ceremonies that are happening. It's just those things point to a problem.

Speaker 1: 51:50

There's this like hey, this might be the thing in this crazy altered state where lots of other things are going on, but if someone's not there going okay, so how did that relate to your trauma? Like all right, what does that make it different? Like now, how do we pull that through every day? And what's the practice and how are you going to set that in your nervous system and what's going to be consistent over time? You know I see very few medicine ceremonies, having care afterwards, like that. So it's people. It's very wide known. It's getting overly used and misused because of the popularity. And yeah, it's like I'm not I don't know if I'm frustrated, I just feel a bit like sad, like oh geez, I need some cleanup after that.

Speaker 2: 52:34

But that might be a couple of years, like you know, but you know it's part of how life is unfolding, one I don't know if the if trauma is the word for this, or if it's maybe trapped, stuck, emotional energy. One of the things I wanted to touch on with you was rage. I've I've heard women say that they've they've felt that and they've not known where it's coming from. I've heard you talk a little bit about that. Can you speak to what that is and what you're seeing little?

Speaker 1: 53:10

bit about that. Can you speak to what that is and what you're seeing? Yes, yes, this has come as such a potent theme in my work and over the past like six months. So, you know, when I watch what happens in my practice, I sort of see, like you know, these are collective themes, it's not just this one off or that one off. It's like many women are just starting to really engage with the most. I call it like the unsung hero, like the most unacknowledged emotion, especially for women, right, because it is the scariest, messiest, most. We will be rejected if we do that and, and I have to say, like most women I know don't even really consider themselves angry or talk about anger. Yeah, maybe a little bit, but like they would never think that they have like deep internal rage.

Speaker 1: 54:16

I was the same, I'm fine, I'm like I don't know, don't even.

Speaker 2: 54:21

I'm good.

Speaker 1: 54:22

I'm fine, totally fine, I'm great, um, so so what I've noticed is that when we can, in the right circumstances and container and and under, start to understand, like that rage was such an appropriate response to what was happening for us. Because the when we can experience that, like a little like flavors of frustration leading into flavors of anger, leading into waves of rage, it's like that's how not okay, you felt that is the red flag waving going. Something is not okay in the world, like boundaries are getting crossed, needs are not getting met, there is nothing to be ashamed of or blame around it. Yet we've got this culture that completely snuffs it out. There's no speaking of this rage. You know there's so in this, you know, in this way, in our in conscious community, we kind of call that like sacred rage, because, wow, to put that, be bold enough again to like put that word sacred in front of a word like rage, like transmission of, of, like what is possible that that could be actually the key to my healing. And I was saying, like I work with women, I work with men now as well, and it's a safe holds true for men when they can really be there in it in a safe way, but not and when I say safe way, it doesn't mean that we're raging, although that can feel really good, but it can be this internal acknowledgement and realization and like experience of like sweating and, like you know, heat, and like it's just again like a very tactile experience within your body. And then, if you can sit with it and stay with it without trying to make it go away with our mind, right, and this is why, again, like breath work and altered states are really sometimes essential in this work right, so that we can stay with it and not get overwhelmed by it in this work. Right, so that we can stay with it and not get overwhelmed by it, not get traumatized by the fact that we are having it and making it mean all these things, when we can just be with it and not an overwhelm, which is a really two key components of healing trauma right, Then I have seen the biggest, the transformations of anyone's life when they have that moment of being with it, acknowledging it, presencing with it, staying with it and then really allowing for that, that to come and and and flow through them, and then it's like it's the root cause of so many people's issues, the root cause of so many people's patterns and we, we don't acknowledge that.

Speaker 1: 57:34

You know, like your relationship patterns would probably instantaneously, well, yeah, give it a good bit with a grain of salt, but I've seen it happen Like they, literally, when you're willing to do a, you know a wide span of work and integration and all and like, stay with it. Right, like it, it the light bulb goes off and you're like I'm not anxious anymore, not triggered by my father anymore, I'm not pushing my partner away because of all of the shame anymore. Right, you know, like it's okay, like something just settles so deeply in their being and the level of lightness and light that you can hold after you purge and transmute and and reintegrate that that rage is like you just expanded your container to hold more light. Like you're open. You're so open for more love now and then it's just more easily flowing in and out of you. There's so much of that pent up nervous system charge. That is rage, right, and so it is something I feel like gosh, wish there was more conversations about this and more ways to show people what a sacred rage look like, because it, I mean, I think, anyone.

Speaker 1: 58:53

When you say rage, you see someone losing their shit and it's so scary they're. Are they going to hurt me? Are they going to hurt themselves? Like that's out of control in the worst way and it's it's. We're so afraid of it. Right, and so sacred rage. Isn't that necessarily Right and so sacred rage? Isn't that necessarily right? But it's in a in a, in a held way, like containing that energy and presencing with it, which again is like you know, I try to say tangible things. I know that that doesn't always sound so tangible, but again, when you do this work it becomes tangible. Like you get. You get how to presence with really intense emotion.

Speaker 2: 59:34

That's part of what I was thinking when you're talking about this. Or the word alchemy is coming to mind too. I don't know that I've had an experience with rage. I've had a few with grief that are like where they're even coming from. I don't know, it has felt ancestral to me and I wouldn't have even used that word until I had that experience because it felt. It felt like a remembering without no, without knowledge, right, like my body was remembering something and probably beneath that, I bet there's some rage there. I would have hung with it longer. There's probably something there, but but that feeling of um containing it, can you speak to that? Or the other word that I've been using is like incubating it, in creating space for it. Um, I think you said the word transmute on here, but can you talk a little bit like do you see that rage transmute, alchemize, transform, or does it dissipate? This isn't.

Speaker 1: 1:00:35

does this question make sense. It totally makes sense, and I wish that there was a linear answer to give um, but there isn't. So it can do many things. Because again it's like we talk about alchemy, because again it's like we talk about alchemy, it's the mystery of energy and what it will do and how it wants to move. It has its own consciousness. So will it dissipate? Maybe Will it transmute into light? Maybe that could be your experience, it could be mine, like it's a lot of different things.

Speaker 1: 1:01:14

I want to kind of just say, like when I say containment, so when we have a emotional charge in our body, that charge has a lifespan, right. So I get activated and then I get, I feel like, an intense sense of emotion. It has a peak and then it's like the top of a wave and then if we don't interrupt it, then eventually it just it comes back down and it baselines again. Every emotion does that. We just go up, we experience the intensity as sensation, without story, if we can do that, and then it will. It will always come back down on its own. Rage is the same right, with rage it's going to be a lot of intensity, it's. But what we, we, you know I was talking about like it doesn't have to be like you, someone losing their shit. But we learned this practice and trauma work of containment, where all of that movement and all of that intensity is an internal sensation. So I have to sit through the fire Like people who've done Vipassana probably know how to you know how this feels like when your knee is aching so much pain and you just sit with it and you just hold it and you breathe and you relax into it as the physiology of your body goes wild and you are just experiencing that in your inner universe, right?

Speaker 1: 1:02:45

But it is intense beyond belief. But it's not the external expression of it, it's the implosion of that sensation, it's the internal writing of, uh, emotion sensation. And so that's what containment means, where we're holding the container around it. But it's happening in here, it's all alive. But if we hold it, it will come to that peak and if we can stay focused like a meditation on it, it will come back down and then we've completed the cycle and our, our cycle. It, once it's complete and not cut off, is gone for good. When we cut off a cycle, then it gets stored in our nervous system as a charge. It's an incomplete charge. So if we let it, any emotion, any feeling, if we give it 60 seconds, it will come up, it will go down uninterrupted, right? That's the lifespan of an emotion.

Speaker 1: 1:03:44

So how many of us can do that, like I don't know work in progress right of us can do that Like I don't know work in progress, right? Um, it's a, it's a highly attuned meditation practice, it's mindfulness, it's felt sense. So we kind of go back to those, like you know, tried and true practices which you need to practice at lower levels of intensity before you can hold those higher levels of intensity. That's why we meditate, that's why we practice. I mean, we do for many reasons, but this is one when we're able to actually hold and contain energy that is intense, without moving away, without fidgeting, without crying, without oh, I gotta go shopping, I gotta check my phone, like ah, you know, like oh, my God, the phone's, like Ooh, wow, they're instant. Distract, distract, distract. You're out of it, you're out of it. You're out of it. You're out of feeling, you're out of feeling.

Speaker 1: 1:04:36

You're out of feeling when we can just stare at something or get a little uncomfortable in a restaurant by yourself.

Speaker 3: 1:04:41

Stare at my phone, like we used to just sit in restaurants and stare at the wall when we were waiting for somebody like it's awkward.

Speaker 2: 1:04:49

Well, I think it's. It seems so simple, but it's like. Well, how do I practice it's? It's, sometimes, it's to me as simple as those moments of like. Can you get comfortable being uncomfortable with what? What makes you uncomfortable? Can you sit with it? Can you sit in silence for 30 minutes in a room with just nothing happening? And I I I'm not um training people like you are by any means and I've found over the last few years just these little ways of like oh, if I, if I had to tell somebody where to start with some of this, it might be as simple as that. Like, can you sit with yourself without your phone and when you feel discomfort in your body, note where you're feeling it, just even to note sensation, because that for me was so foreign. It was, it was a moment.

Speaker 2: 1:05:40

Uh, my coach years ago in my job. I was talking to her about a difficult decision I had to make and how I just I knew in this moment and she asked me it seems so silly, but it's not silly at all this question, I feel like, was so pivotal in my, my journey. She just said well, where did you feel that in your body? And I had never thought in my mind to consider where I felt it in my body. But just tuning into that has been obviously a huge unlock and in so many ways, a huge unlock in in so many ways. Yeah, it's been good.

Speaker 2: 1:06:11

Yeah, okay, I would love to, if you're up for it, do we have a little bit more time, are you good? Yeah, okay, okay. Can we come back to and then dive in on modern day priestess and the remembering who we are? I know you've got a program coming up next year and maybe this will be a little touch point for some people that might be interested in working with you. But on the um, would you call them archetypes I see? Divine master, creatress, creatrix, seductress of spirits, yeah, so some of these can you touch on?

Speaker 1: 1:06:48

touch on that, what it means to be a modern day priestess, and then some of this yumminess, yes, because this is the it's it's kind of fun and like, and it's it's like because life is fun and life is magical and life is like it's energy and we can literally create what we want with and and I I know like I don't want to jump on this, like you know, cheesy manifestation thing, but when you really understand it you can.

Speaker 1: 1:07:23

When you are unafraid of your own limitations, when you have harnessed the ability to, to like corral your fear and make that into something else like motivation. You can do anything, Like I've lived all over the world and done the wildest things, just because I feel safe. I feel safe in the world, I feel safe in my body, I know I've got me and like I'm alive. When I'm experiencing life, you know, tasting the flavors and going to the places, and I mean that's just my, my soul's expression. So, uh, it took a while to get to that point where I don't choose safety and comfort. I mean I like safety and comfort. I have some of that and I need some grounding, but at the same time that doesn't limit me in my life. So when I speak about being a modern-day priestess, it's not just to be kind of catchy or appealing Legitimately. This is the path of the priestess is to train our emotional or mental being into an awakened and mature emotional being, into knowing how to harness the power of my Shakti and sensual energy and heal the relationship that I have with my body and understanding that this body is literally a light vessel, and then into working with energy on a daily basis. Consistency over time, with a practice that has a lineage. This is my thing, right, let's do, let's, let's build off of what our ancestors have already given us through prayers and meditation and and yogas and all of these things. But I have kind of this um, this variety, this alchemy of how we bring all of that together and then live as mothers, as women who have full-time jobs. Our world doesn't match the ancients, you know the ancient tribal world anymore, right? So we've got to take those ancient traditions, remember how to be connected in our power, not in this compete, complain, compare, wounded feminine template, but of the connect, cooperate, collaborate and lift each other up. You know like I teach sisterhood essentially. You know, like many of us do, because I need it, I need it, you know, I, I, I want us to be in community. I love watching people together, men and women, but for women it's especially important. We were built for that. That's our.

Speaker 1: 1:10:33

The way our brain is set up is collaboration and community, and we so try to solopreneur our lives, that we end up in our overly masculine place because we've got to be the protective provider, got to be the protective provider, we've got to be achieving, and then we've got to be wild and sassy and sexual and feminine, you know, like all the things it's just like we can't, we're burned out. Burned out, I don't like adrenal fatigue, you know. So what I'm, or, um, kind of allow for women to experience is their greatness through getting the mind to come offline with all of the critic and all of the distortion, and realign and resource in love, right, so we have to learn how to connect and meditate and focus and then harness our energy and and direct it out in a healthy way. And we need healing around boundaries, around communication. We need healing with the masculine, feminine within inner child work Like.

Speaker 1: 1:11:48

So the program is, is like a system of all of that so that we can in the end or, you know, always work in progress again that we are always striving to be in the place where I am walking through the world, unafraid of expressing the unique, like gift that I am I'm meant to be offering my expression, my art, my love. Everyone's will flow through them in a different way, but please get to the place where you're offering it, because that is the healing that this planet needs, that this world needs, that the whole world needs to awaken from that patriarchal iron age. Like we need to accelerate this process right now, cause it's it's, it's heavy and it's dark and we are the light ones coming in and saying like we've got to do this now. So, like who's got the guidebook?

Speaker 3: 1:12:52

coming in and saying like we've got to do this now. So like who's got the guidebook? Like I don't know, is it me who knows?

Speaker 1: 1:12:58

Like I've got something and you have something and we've got something, but let's all do it together and learn from each other and learn how to stand in our power and not get taken down by our possessed mind with, you know, consumerism and the distraction and the numbness it's an epidemic, the numbness and I want to hopefully guide people into like the aliveness and that to me is like I can alchemize because I can turn the shadow and I can like shit light because I know how to move that energy in my body. So damn, I really want to show everybody.

Speaker 1: 1:13:41

I want to show people how to do that, and many people know how, but that's what I'm about, like if I can help people through that and and help hold their hand into the places that they are so afraid to go into and show them that is not scary, that we can do it and you can do it, we can do it together, you can be seen in it, we can heal it, and then you can come out the other side and you can start accessing this higher divine force that you are and and there's a real method to that.

Speaker 3: 1:14:19

You know, and please take a step in, like we are on this path, like things have got to be warm and let's do it Right. Yeah, and it's beautiful because you feel alive.

Speaker 1: 1:14:27

Oh, my God, you feel so like light bubbles and aliveness and like juiciness and life again, and the story of loneliness goes away. There's a loneliness, like you know. It's like, yeah, I used to feel really fucking lonely, but do I now? No, I am connected to like God and God force and source. And then I have my network, because I built it, because I spent time doing that, I, I, I invested in that Right and that's my offering Right. So it's like I also offer this community, where women come again and again and they make friends and they're all on the same page with like, okay, this is what, this is why we're here, and I'm not everyone's flavor, but, man, it's really fun with the ones that want to come play you know, I love that, I love that we're, that we're circling to this, because I think, I think sometimes we can polar, we can all we can always polarize right and so many different directions.

Speaker 2: 1:15:30

But we can look at healing work and get really focused in on shadow work and pain and healing and oh, this is so hard. And I hear people say this this inner work is such hard work, and that's true. Like it is, it's not easy, it takes courage, it's messy, it's you've have like it's all of that. And I often ask, well, well, well, why would we want to do that then? Why the hell would I want?

Speaker 1: 1:15:53

to walk into the darkest place of my life.

Speaker 2: 1:15:55

What's the end game here? Can you promise me something? But what you're just saying, that aliveness, that I, I would like. Adventure. There's this sense of adventure to it too, when you're like it's not a cheesy manifestation thing, but to know like I get to be a co-creator, like I get to create this beautiful life and connect with amazing people, and it's just yeah, juicy is the way, it's just like oh yeah, it's so, it's so alive, it's so alive, it's beautiful. So I'm glad you're you're expressing that in this conversation too. It's really great. Okay, I have one selfish question for you before we leave. You tell me what you know about mermaids and water, because I'm like, I'm researching it. I have the Mary Magdalene book that, um, sarah and Bert burst yeah, I have that book and then, like, opened it to the one chapter, it was like no way, cause there's all these serendipity moments with mermaids in my life and I don't know what it means. So if you have anything to offer to eliminate, this is my selfish question.

Speaker 3: 1:17:05

No, it's cool. It's funny because you it's.

Speaker 1: 1:17:08

It's not like I, like I, you know, have like studied the, the lineage of the mermaid, but when you speak about it I go right into. I work with water a lot, I work with the spirit of the water, I work with the codes of the water. I am, you know, in oceans and springs and waterfalls a lot, because the spirit flows through me and and I feel like those are sacred portals. Right, it is the divine feminine, it's water, right, it's. It's like it's the life giving elixir that you know pours out onto this earth, that creates, you know, all creation, but I feel like it really comes from the stars. So, when I really tune into the, the, the mermaid energy or the mermaid archetype, again, we look at, like, what is the embodiment of the mermaid? She is the embodiment of water, right, she's the, the, the master or, let's say, the mistress of the water. She is the mystery of the water and she's also the voice of the water. And we were talking about, like mermaids, sirens. Some, you know, some people like to talk about sirens as well. Right, so the siren is, is the voice of the water, she's the voice of the cosmos, the voice of the frequency of creation. Right. So, as we, you know, flow towards, like you, flow towards being in that.

Speaker 1: 1:18:34

That essence, that unique expression that is flowing through you is like ah, how do I work with the waters of my body? Right, and I, I call that forth by honoring. You know that this is my lineage the water people. You know, the water beings and also being the voice of the feminine, the voice of the water, the expression of it, the beauty of it. Right, we see, she's a goddess.

Speaker 1: 1:19:01

Right, the mermaid is another form of a goddess and an image that we hold that embodies an energy. Right, and she is the waters. Right, and to me, I wish I could.

Speaker 1: 1:19:16

I keep saying water all over, you know many times, but I wish I could describe more deeply the sensation that I get, the connection of my heart and the cosmic connection that I get and the the land energy I get when I say the word water, it's spirit, like water is spirit, right, water is god, like that's. So anything that works with that, you know, like bringing it up and out, is a beautiful thing that you should follow and harness, and then all it is is like being, like going into the water and being the mermaid, like merging, transfiguring into the mermaid and seeing what comes out of you, what voice, what sound, what insight, what energy flows through your being as you embody that, and that will give you more information than anything else than reading about them or you know, studying a lineage or whatever, but I'm sure that would be fun too, I know there's like a whole mermaid tribe and they're really I don't know anything about that.

Speaker 2: 1:20:24

But this, yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, oh, that feels so much of this conversation. I mean this, just my body is just like a hell yes, throughout this conversation, just a clear and free, like resonant hell yes, and um, it's so wild to be remote like this and have that experience to me, cause it just you know. Remote like this and have that experience to me, cause it just you know, it's a new newish thing for a lot of people. But yeah, um, yeah, thank you for sharing your energy and your voice and your wisdom today and, um, for going into the depths that you've gone into to beat to shit light. Oh, it's such a gift, it's such a gift to me I said this after we hopped off our call the other day just like I feel so I don't know if lucky, blessed, like I just feel so alive from these conversations and so thankful to be having them. So, thank you for taking your time and just sharing of yourself today. It's just such a gift to me personally and to the people that are going to be listening and watching.

Speaker 1: 1:21:40

Absolutely, I feel the same. Thank you for all of that inspiration and and just being another mirror right, or just we can up our mirror right, or just we can up our, our vibration, being together and being in resonance with like that, that exciting energy. It's like we invited it in and so it graced us with its presence and then we played with it and we expanded it, and that's the feminine right. And this is again the beauty of like when, when you interview a man that might be a little more intellectual which is great, amazing, so like we need the understanding, but when we play with women, women and women like this, it's like, can I transmit energy to you? That's that's how I want to teach, right? Yeah, like, this is a different kind of transmission, the feminine transmission.

Speaker 2: 1:22:31

Yeah, it's beautiful. Thank you, Alana. Thank you, we'll be right back. Thank you, bye.