Speaker 1: 0:00

The word courage, the root cur means heart, oh my gosh. So we often think that it's like courage is the warrior going to battle, and really it's the mama holding the space. And you are not alone. That light is within all of us and it is being ignited in all different pockets and faiths and areas, and that is incredible.

Speaker 2: 0:32

Welcome to the Whole Shebang. I'm Jen Briggs, your host. Let me tell you what you're in for here. Many of us have been running at breakneck speed, functioning mostly in our heads, and we've suffered from disconnection, burnout and lost passions. I believe it's because we functioned in part and not in whole. So we're exploring a new path, embracing intuition, creativity, playfulness and connection in all of life. It's vibrant, powerful and magnetic. So come on with me and buckle up buttercups. We're diving in me and buckle up buttercups we're diving in.

Speaker 2: 1:08

The story that you're going to hear today is truly inspiring and hey, I couldn't say that word unless I actually meant it. I was listening back and editing this episode and have genuinely been inspired from the inside out by Robin's courage, by her heart, by her wisdom, her transparency, her resilience, which is the word she wants to be known for and I know you guys are going to love this episode and take so much from it. Today, I do want to offer a trigger warning that she shares her story, which does involve domestic violence and abuse, and so if that's something that you're sensitive to, you may not want to tune into this. While we talk about that, we talk about so much about forgiveness and finding the freedom on the other side of going through that and doing the work. She talks about her own journey of personal wellness and different healing modalities. We dive pretty deep into Reiki and energy. We discuss the power of connection and sharing stories like this, that, although I don't have her story, that there are always bits and parts that we see in one another and I really it's. Just the more that I'm doing these episodes, the more I'm like what a beautiful patchwork we make. It is just so lovely. We of course talk about coming back to the heart and to love and how that is the greatest form of courage, which serendipitously comes perfectly on the heels of my mini bang from last week.

Speaker 2: 2:43

Let me share a little bit about Robin. She is a passionate, multi-certified and licensed wellness educator who teaches workshops or treats and coaching programs for individuals and businesses seeking lifelong wellness solutions. Through her business, robin's Wellness, robin found her way back to health in the process of healing crippling mental and physical illness. She utilizes her experience to inspire and support igniting self-empowered, personalized wellness and others. Robin teaches inner fitness practices and simple nutrition strategies to build balance in the body and mind for increased resilience and joy when you're ready to activate your holistic wellness. Robin has created Meditation Momentum, a 21-day meditation journey for people with busy schedules and minds to build inner fitness, the Balance your Body and Macronutrient Starter Kit and the Mindful Eating Interactive Workbook as resources to move you along on your path of transformation.

Speaker 2: 3:39

So I'm going to share all of that, along with her website in the show notes, robinwellnesscom. I cannot wait for you to feel the connection with her via the interwebs and podcast today. You all are going to absolutely adore her Enjoy. Welcome to whole shebang, robin. Oh, thank you. Will you do me the honor and say the catch line or phrase?

Speaker 1: 4:05

Let's get ready, Buckle up buttercup.

Speaker 2: 4:10

Okay, we're here. We have so many things we can talk about. Let's start with your story. Let's start with who you are. I know in the conversations that we've had, you've used the word trauma big T trauma and so I know we'll talk about that but also where you're at now in life and the tools or other things that you're using to grow, navigate, be vibrant. How's that sound? All the good stuff that sounds wonderful.

Speaker 1: 4:32

All right. Well, you know, even as you say, the big T and a bunch of little T's, trauma. Really, the word that I want to be known for as Robin Richards, who owns Robin's Wellness, where we, you know, focus on lifelong wellness solutions, is resilience, because that that is what needs to be at the forefront of the conversation and of people's minds, because there is always a way out minds, because there is always a way out. It's through, but there is another side, and so, though I have lived and experienced so much with darkness, with setbacks, there have also been opportunities within all of that to be set up for going toward the light, and I really think it's so powerful, the work that you're doing here to illuminate the journey, and so many people can't see that, because when you are going towards the light but you start in the dark, the first few steps are still dark. That's a good way of putting it, yeah, and so you know, when I share my story, um, it really all begins with a very big T, and so I like to trigger, warn people, um, as they listen to my story, that as a child, when I was one month into kindergarten, I witnessed my mother's death, and it was by the hands of her husband, who was my stepfather, and it was very traumatic, very violent, and one incident like that is not exclusive. There was a lot of trauma leading up to that and that was a transformative experience for me, but the resilience shines in the fact that there was love of my father, who then took me in full time, and of my grandparents and of my community, including the fact that I was in kindergarten and then transitioned to a new school where people loved me for who I was, for the traumatized little girl that would have to escape from the classroom at the drop of a hat. For you remember that childhood slogan like don't step on a crack, you'll break your mother's back. Yeah Well, you never know what that's going to bring up for a child who just witnessed their mother's murder. And yet I was able to be myself and to be seen and supported, and part of that was my parents, my now stepmother. But at the time my father's girlfriend and my father put me in therapy, and so you don't meet a lot of 41 year olds who have been in therapy for 37 years. But here I am and I was able to use my voice and navigate growing up.

Speaker 1: 7:39

But then my post-traumatic stress disorder really transformed into complex PTSD when I began college and my mother's murderer was first eligible to be released from prison, and so my entire adult life was haunted with this villain, with this character. That wasn't fiction and the impending circumstance of what will happen when he's released. And now, on the other side of all of it, I can see how the complexity of that manifested in many different ways, including in my own struggles with infertility, to become a mother, my struggles with addiction, which was really just forms of self-soothing, self-salvation to be able to navigate the world and hold all of the pain that I was pushing down versus truly processing. But again, jen, it's so beautiful because without the pain and without the process that I had to go through, I wouldn't be where I am now, which is a person who lives what I teach because I have to and because as close as anyone is to being mother Teresa, they are just as close to being Hitler.

Speaker 2: 9:22

Whoa, I feel that. Talk to me about that.

Speaker 1: 9:27

Well, you speak so eloquently with so many of your guests who are holding a voice for the truth. That is, the feminine and the masculine energy, and just as there is both of those components, there are multiple components that live within each of us, and it's really the wolf. They're both wolves, the wolf you choose to feed. Which one is it? And though we need both the feminine and masculine energies, we don't need both the light and the darkness in order to align our lives in the direction that we we desire.

Speaker 2: 10:18

When did you? So I don't want to assume anything, so you just stop me. If I'm not. I imagine that you having that kind of perspective is a part of what's allowed you, a part of what's allowed you to live in freedom, right when you, when you have your mother's murderer haunting, sort of haunting your life, to have a perspective, that which is so fucking powerful that you've been able to gain that perspective, that like, okay, we're all made up of the same stuff, we all have the ability to be this or that. Which wolf are we going to feed? So you're seeing, you're seeing his your humanity, yeah, his humanity.

Speaker 2: 11:07

Yeah, having some empathy, empathy for him 100%. How did you?

Speaker 1: 11:13

get there Like well. It's not something you just wake up and do right. It's something that is a transformative process. If there's one word that I wish the world would embrace more, it would be forgiveness. I was just going to ask you forgiveness, and forgiveness is an act that is a process. It's not a one and done because there are layers, a one and done because there are layers. If you choose to be a person who really is working or walking the path of transformation, to be the best version of yourself, it's a continual unfolding. I've heard you say that multiple times. It's like that Lotus flower.

Speaker 2: 12:06

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 12:08

And therefore things that I've gone through. Um, I continually provide space to be able to reprocess in my new phases of development and understanding, in my new phases of development and understanding. And that especially is true with forgiveness. For me, forgiveness is not about the actual act. There's no forgiving violence, right, there's no forgiving what happened to my mother, and especially when I had my own daughter who turned that age to see really what that little girl, to be able to see that reflected in my daughter, but then truly to transform the healing inside of me, to see that little innocent child and to know, as the adult that grew up in that trauma and how that shaped my perspective of life, in that trauma and how that shaped my perspective of life. There's no forgiving the act, but there is forgiveness, because that is the key to freedom for me.

Speaker 1: 13:14

For too many years it held me back, including it manifested.

Speaker 1: 13:20

The body keeps the score is such a phenomenal text, right, not a light reading by any breath of the imagination, but it is true.

Speaker 1: 13:28

When I picked up that book I felt the vibration because it was defining for me what I knew to be true, that all of these things had manifested in my life, because my body was keeping that score, not just of my trauma, but of generational trauma. Not just of my trauma, but of generational trauma. And I've dug into the work to see how, what happened to my mother, how that actually manifested in the years of her life and even of her ancestors the ancestors that we have. And it would be narrow to only do that for my mother, because that exists in all of us. We all were born as little, tiny, blessed angels. We weren't born to come onto this existence to create more suffering and pain. That's part of the human experience. There always will be suffering, there will always will be pain, but the suffering is the option and the choices that we make are how all of those things unfold. And it would inhibit my ability to be free if I did not forgive.

Speaker 2: 14:46

So I'm just trying to imagine, to imagine, and I, we, like you said, we all have people or circumstances, or self to forgive.

Speaker 1: 14:57

Right and so.

Speaker 2: 15:00

I'm glad. Okay, so I'm. I'm thinking about people that are listening right now, that have people to forgive or have if, if we don't have to forgive a heinous act, what are we forgiving and how? How did that look for you on a practical level? Like, does that look like you just like repeating yourself over? Probably not like I'm forgiving this, I'm forgiving this. Like, does that look like you just like repeating yourself over? Probably not Like I'm forgiving this, I'm forgiving this. Like what do you do? How did it look?

Speaker 1: 15:30

That's a great question. The first piece, that is essential. I mean I'm going to be honest, I flailed through most of it. Sure, right, I mean it was looking back. That hindsight is where you get that clear vision.

Speaker 1: 15:44

Yeah, and so that's when I'm working with people on lifelong wellness. It's founded right now in the practices that have taken me a lifetime to develop, and the most essential components are around your inner fitness. And then I also teach simple nutrition, because how we fuel our body on a physical level also informs how we're able to function internally, and inner fitness is really where resilience lies. Inner fitness is the ability to not only mentally approach the world but emotionally as well. And the first piece is you have to be able to create a sense of safety. And you know Maslow's hierarchy of needs the very first level is around safety and security.

Speaker 1: 16:39

So part of my background is for 13 years I served as a high school math teacher and I hold my principal license, and that work was transformative because, though I was doing professional development around educating children, it really was applicable. Personal development, especially Carol DeWitt's work around mindset and growth mindset and I've been a person who has always been really gifted and intense is what I prefer to call it now. What's the alternative to that? Well, you know, a little quirky and weird and passionate and loud I'm all about quirky, weird, passionate, loud.

Speaker 1: 17:17

And my deepest lifelong learning has always been about how, from every scenario that I get into, can I really apply that into my life, and so being in the world of public education and being able to apply those things into my life helped me see, okay, in order to really create that sense of safety and security for people to learn, I had to do that for myself, and so ways that I have done that yoga was transformational for me. I was gifted that. My stepmother loved yoga and so in the um, early nineties, was the first time that I did yoga and that was a practice and still continues to be for me that allows me to move my body in a way that I'm working towards the end, shavasana, where that's when the integration happens right but getting in my body and creating that sense of safety, tapping into my nervous system to so that it knows that I am safe. Um, that also looks a lot like a daily meditation practice and working on mindset.

Speaker 1: 18:36

So I love that you started saying do you just say affirmations I forgive, I forgive, I forgive, sometimes, sure, yeah, prayer. I mean it's a whole cadre of items that have served me for different reasons in different seasons, but the one of the gifts that I have had around being so into learning and lifelong education is that that has fueled my resilience, because I just never wanted to stop trying new things. Trying things because I knew there had to be a better way and if there wasn't, then I was going to die trying. And let me tell you, I almost did. But I continue to practice and one of the ways that, in my path of transformation, thriving in my life means teaching so that I can serve the world and so that I also hold myself accountable.

Speaker 2: 19:42

I really appreciate that you're setting this literal framework and foundation for what it means to create safety, and I've talked several times on the podcast about the nervous system piece and and so once you've created this space of safety and told your body it's okay, was your experience that things were then coming sort of up and out that you could forgive at that point, or it's interesting being asked the question because I it.

Speaker 1: 20:15

It takes my mind to over 20 years worth of different experiences working with multiple practitioners. Um, I find so much value in therapy, um, and multiple forms of therapy, so I've done cognitive behavior therapy. Um, emdr was transformative around when my mother's murderer was finally released from prison and I thought I was fine until I wasn't and was getting crippling panic attacks. You know, emdr was really for me the gateway that merged the science behind these intuitive practices that I knew were true and that I like to call like the world of woo right Cause I'm a Reiki master teacher now. But it took me learning quantum physics in order to really step into that, that world. And EMDR was one of those catalyzing modalities that helped me to better understand that trauma truly is trapped, it gets trapped, energy gets trapped. We all are energy.

Speaker 1: 21:28

So getting back to the body keeps the score. Just those words of the book. It makes sense. We know we can feel things, there's intuition and you know, I would venture to say that that's more of the feminine energy, that's what the divine feminine is meant to be, that's what mother earth, it's that, that energy right, that is beyond language. It's this feeling this sensation, I'm getting goosebumps. Right now, I can tell you're aligning with it. Right, it's, it's, and.

Speaker 1: 22:00

And yet, as humans, we are gifted with language to be able to. And yet, as humans, we are gifted with language to be able to attempt to share experiences and I use the word attempt very purposefully, because perspective creates reality and what one person thinks when you're even saying the word feminine right, feminine energy, that can mean a whole, whole different thing. And again it gets back to how do we create safety so that there are safe spaces where we can do what we're meant to do, which is come together in community to be able to learn and grow, and ultimately, that's healing. Learning and growth is healing. And getting back to your question, and this would probably be a great opportunity to really highlight the fact that there's some strong neurodivergence that lies within me, and so conversations are as my life has been, which is a beautiful cyclical, yeah.

Speaker 2: 23:05

Tangential spiral.

Speaker 1: 23:07

Yeah and um versus, you know, trying to just go concrete and linear, right it's. It's just so much more fun to be able to see these let's yes, let's spin and dance in the moonlight. So it though. Therapy was a huge portion for me and continues to be. It also was community, and I have sought out community for me.

Speaker 1: 23:35

When I was in public education, I was planted into these communities of like-minded people who were working towards the betterment of others and then, also merging that with my healing, I've attended, you know, infertility group counseling.

Speaker 1: 23:57

I've attended cognitive or, excuse me, dialectical behavioral therapy, which was a group program, and then, you know, most recently within the last six years, I was a group program. And then, you know, most recently within the last six years, I'm a recovering addict, and so I've been gifted with so many different forms of recovery fruit through that. And last summer I actually helped my dad transition out of this life, and he suffered from early onset dementia as well as Parkinson's. And then one of the first things that I did, that I was called to do, was attended a dementia support group, because I needed others to be able to normalize my experience, and to me that's where God speaks is when I'm listening to others, because it's not within me, that's the ego, it's creating space. So I can hear that inner guidance through meditation, through Reiki, but also when I'm still enough to be able to hear it in other people.

Speaker 2: 24:59

So good the community piece has been. So it seems like, of course, of course we need community. It's just it's coming back to me over and over and over and when we were out this few days ago just talking about, like, the power of a network that is building in the community that is building, I think one of the pieces, as you were talking a minute ago, it within community that's so powerful is is the nature of sharing our story, um, and hearing our stories and other people, because there's something, uh, really negatively powerful I'm going to just hesitantly use the word negative but maybe ineffective.

Speaker 1: 25:41

Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 2: 25:42

Yeah, about a story that's hidden and when. And to me, that connectedness to forgiveness. When I, when I'm thinking about the times that were hardest to forgive myself, it was the hidden story. And as soon as I was in community and able to share my story and somebody was able to sit across me and reflect, reflect it back to me, like, okay, so I'm hearing you say this. Or. Or there were times that they were like, oh well, back to me Like, okay, so I'm hearing you say this, or. Or there were times that they were like, oh well, that's it.

Speaker 2: 26:09

You're like I've been carrying this around for 20 years and you're going to tell me, oh, that's it, but there, but there is so much healing in so many different aspects of community and real connection, and I think that I think that that's a part that's probably a little it's probably a little egoic to even say that that like we're entering a new time where community is important. It's like, are you kidding me? We've lived in villages for all of history, but maybe it's because our society has and American society in particular, has gotten so away from a true sense of community, where you have a village of people, you're sharing stories, you're reflecting things back to one another. You're sharing burdens, you're sharing heartache, you're sharing joys Like what does that look like? How do we create that? And it sounds to me like you've created. I think you are a creator of community, by the way.

Speaker 1: 27:05

Well, thank you for that.

Speaker 2: 27:07

In a really powerful way and you've sought it out, you've found it, you've put yourself in those places which not everybody does Like. That takes a lot. You're really vulnerable. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 27:18

Really vulnerable.

Speaker 2: 27:21

Have you always been a vulnerable person?

Speaker 1: 27:25

I can't remember not being vulnerable. I don't, and I don't know what the root of that is right Like. Is it how I was born? Or is it because of the tragedy that I went through and then the nurturing that I received? I was raised as an only child, you know. I was around adults a lot, so I was comfortable having adult conversations also, being in therapy for all of those years, feeling like I had that voice, but being a natural leader and someone who has things to say. I'm not sure exactly where it comes from. And what's really beautiful about my journey right now is that I'm okay, Not knowing so many years of my life I spent digging and digging and digging to the root, and that was absolutely necessary for that season of my life.

Speaker 1: 28:22

But I am in a season right now, personally, where, where I'm present and this though, I take care of all the little Robins and have done healing around those little Robins.

Speaker 1: 28:35

I am Robin right here today and I am laying a foundation for lifelong wellness for the Robin that is aging into the future.

Speaker 1: 28:46

And the truth of my trauma is I never thought that that Robin would exist.

Speaker 1: 28:50

My little brain thought that I would die by the time that I was 33. And so it's a huge accomplishment to be where I am right now and laying that foundation, and I think that you are hitting the nail right on the head with speaking to us, really coming back to our roots, of addressing the needs that are absolutely essential for that safety which is being seen, seen just as we are in community, and though there are a lot of varying things in our society right now, the reality is, when you sit down and break bread I think there's something about coming together with food and you break bread with another, especially with the other you end up seeing into their soul. Hmm, and there's not. There's more that is the same than is different, but fear is very loud right now. And you know, what else could we expect living in a capitalistic society? Because when you're looking at a profit and you speak to the pain points, money flows that way and there's a lot more obviously to unpack around those places.

Speaker 2: 30:24

What does Robin have to say about that?

Speaker 1: 30:26

Well, I have a lot of things to say about it, but it depends who. I'm saying it to you and I had spoken about how to answer questions around different people. I don't have a problem with that yesterday.

Speaker 2: 30:37

Can I share that on here? Go ahead, yeah, yeah. So we were at dinner for the listeners. We were at dinner a couple of nights ago, robin and I and another woman, and we were talking about faith and religion, and I can't remember who asked who or how we got to talking about Christianity. I think I was sharing about the one of my most recent episodes and you had asked me if I was a Christian and I, reluctantly, I was like no, no, I wouldn't label myself that way, and here's why. But there's a but. I believe that Christ was divine and and then I said are you? And you said, well, it, it depends who's asking. And then I said, well, how do you answer the question then, when somebody asks and you say well, that's it's.

Speaker 1: 31:21

It's an interesting thing because when you're with someone, you can usually read their energy, and I know you're talking to a lot of different people who are sharing so many different gifts around. Claire senses and I definitely label myself an empath, and do you define yourself as an empath?

Speaker 2: 31:40

I don't know how to define that. How would you, how would you know, how would I?

Speaker 1: 31:43

know other people's feelings. Oh yeah, the energy is palpable for me, and um the more that I open myself up to it. It's really clear. Sense Sentience is when you can sense right, you feel. Um, when I opened myself up to it, I then can match that vibration so that I create resonance versus dissonance. You learn that by creating a lot of dissonance in your life, by living with a lot of it inside of myself.

Speaker 1: 32:15

But you know, personally I am a Christian, I believe that Jesus is the son of God, and often with circles that I'm in, that's where the conversation can and should end and where we can see each other and pray together to do what is greater and what Jesus's mission really was all about, which is love and light. There's other circles where the conversation goes different and deeper, especially for me, being a person who was raised by atheists, who experienced such significant childhood trauma and then was placed into a private Catholic high school because it was the best education and that's what my dad and stepmother valued the most. And so there was a stint where I practiced Buddhism and there was a stint where I have attended different religious organizations. But for me now, especially in my continued evolving healing and recovery. My relationship with God is so sacred and I've had to do a lot of work to heal that trauma around the religion.

Speaker 1: 33:28

Not my life right, Not my life experiences. Yes, that has been a lot of work, but the religious trauma and the biggest piece that helped me to heal that and I knew that it would, because it's part of the teachings was becoming a Reiki master teacher.

Speaker 2: 33:45

So let's talk about that. What does that mean?

Speaker 1: 33:53

about that. What does that mean? Well, reiki is founded in the way that we know it today, just a little over a hundred years ago in Japan. And I say founded, but really I should use the word formalized, because Reiki, the root of the word ki in Japanese, is the same as chi in Chinese, it's the same as prana in Sanskrit, and all of those mean universal life force energy. All civilizations, all people have been using the concept of this universal life force energy since pre-written time. It's just that, reiki, there is a master who formalized how to really work with the energy, to channel it for love and light, for healing. My first Reiki healing session was with a Christian healer, a little over a decade ago.

Speaker 2: 34:49

You were the patient, I was the patient, yeah.

Speaker 1: 34:53

We gotta be careful using those words right, Because it's not what the right words are.

Speaker 2: 34:57

I'm like I don't know yeah.

Speaker 1: 34:59

Let's not let the FDA come in and regulate that one it was. I was the client, and I was receiving the healing, and the Reiki master I was receiving the healing from was a devout Christian and would receive her Reiki guidance by working with Jesus, and she communicated it to me that she related it like Reiki's working with the Holy Spirit, and it's that energy that connects and binds all things. Now fast forward, though I had this profound healing experience, I didn't actually get into Reiki myself as a practitioner until I met someone who was studying quantum physics and was a Reiki master.

Speaker 2: 35:42

All right, this is where it's all at for me, yeah.

Speaker 1: 35:45

It's merging.

Speaker 1: 35:45

One of my favorite lines that I use is that I like to merge science with the world of woo yeah, and that of course it works for you, jen, because you're all about unpacking the masculine to embrace the divine feminine and really they coexist Right, and that's even with everything that I teach around lifelong wellness. I don't believe in the word alternative. I believe in all of the alternative practices, but that they should be used in conjunction. They're complimentary and that each person should be ignited to be self-empowered to create personal wellness plans that bring in conventional care because that's real and the complimentary alternative, holistic practices. So Reiki is accessing this universal life force, energy, and basically becoming a conduit for it.

Speaker 1: 36:41

So I am not healing another person when I'm doing a Reiki session, which I never got into Reiki to be a Reiki healer. I got into Reiki because I wanted another tool to help ignite self-empowerment in others, and the first Reiki healing I ever performed was on my infant daughter and it was before I knew what I was doing. But I was praying over her and I felt my crown chakra open and the energy come in and come out through the palm of my hand as I lay it over her.

Speaker 2: 37:12

Okay, let's talk about this Okay. Okay, I'm going to like break this down. So the science behind it. So talk to me about the quantum physics piece. And you're right, I need to stop.

Speaker 2: 37:24

I'm lately, I'm like I got to stop apologizing for things, but I I feel like the whole science thing for me initially came from a place of insecurity around. Talking about the woo, a hundred percent, you know, I was like, okay, let me figure out the science, because I know the woo makes sense, because I just know it, I feel it, I see it. And in order for me to a not think that P other people think I'm crazy but also to be a bridge to help them understand it, let me, let me see if there's science. Ultimately, I didn't really find this science. The science found me. The science showed up because it just is, it is. There are universal truths behind quantum physics and all of this stuff. So when, when I started to see where they crossed, then I was like, okay, everything that I thought was spiritual science and everything that I thought was science is spiritual. Whoa, you had an Einstein moment.

Speaker 1: 38:21

Is that what that is? I mean, that's what I'm going to call it now, but if you know, like we, we are taught so little about Einstein, he was actually a spiritual leader.

Speaker 2: 38:29

I just saw a couple of quotes about him on, I don't know Pinterest or.

Speaker 1: 38:32

Instagram or something. Well, I'm going to go back to my days in education, because I graduated college in 2004. And a few years after that is when all of the brain research was really being used to restructure, especially math education, and that is a tangible thing that most parents can relate to. When your child comes home and is all of a sudden not doing long division anymore and doing multiplication and a lattice method, and you get some people who are real fired up about that right.

Speaker 1: 39:08

Cause it's new and it doesn't make sense and whatever else. And we're talking about math, which those methods are actually based on brain research and how to better form number sense. That is then more transferable in all different areas and skills, including advanced mathematics, but also life, and then, in conjunction with all of the work around growth mindset. Now, why did that all happen during that time? Well, good, teachers already knew how to teach and they knew how to meet people where they were at and activate those pieces. But it wasn't until the late nineties that MRI technology was developed to be able to measure a brain while it was living.

Speaker 1: 39:54

That's not that long ago. That's not wild, yeah, because I'm not that old Jen, neither am I. We're young kids, we are, we are just emerging. So in the late 90s is the first time we were able to measure the brain and how it was working. Does that mean it wasn't working before we were able to measure it? No, and so in my professional work and putting those pieces together that I then have now transferred into just knowing some remedial things about quantum physics, but just the general aspect that we are more space than we are matter, and so it makes sense that there are things that science can't yet measure, that yet still are true, right yeah?

Speaker 2: 40:37

So so one of those things is energy. So you've have somebody in a session and you're the Reiki, what's it called Practitioner, and so you open yourself up and receive energy.

Speaker 1: 40:53

I become the straw, that is the conduit, and then use my intuition to feel, because energy transcends time and space. So that's why you can do distance healings as well. My ego doesn't like distance healing, so my ego likes to be here and now. Yeah, to be here and now, yeah. And so if we were doing one in person, it's really getting grounded and open, to be the conduit, to allow the energy to be concentrated, because the energy is flowing in and around us all of the time. But to concentrate that energy and provide the space so that then, getting to the science of what's happening in that client is their nervous system is finally relaxing because they are co-regulating with me.

Speaker 1: 41:38

Co-regulation is a real thing that is measurable, just like dysregulation is a real thing that we can tell. It's what happens with group think, even, and getting back I love these neurodivergent conversations to community. That's why we need community, because we need co-regulation. We need that. That's literally the vibe, it's our vibration, and so in a session to create that space. But in order to create that space, I have to be practicing and holding that for myself.

Speaker 1: 42:14

So, cause I'm a human with all sorts of different things happening in my life and falling out of alignment.

Speaker 1: 42:22

There's a saying in yoga that in order to find balance, you have to fall out of balance, and really that's true in all of life and so continuously practicing these elements to be the best conduit to hold that space and help support others in the energy flowing through them. The most beautiful thing about Reiki for me is that it is subconscious. So, versus going to a deep therapy session where you're using your mind to unpack whatever it is and make those connections, that's valuable and there's a time and a space for it. I'm pretty exhausted by doing that and quite a bit of that work has re-traumatized me in ways, and what Reiki has allowed me to do is do the deep energetic healing because, just like we have organs in our physical body, we have energetic organs, that's the chakras, that's the energy centers, and the Reiki helps those to do what we're meant to do, which is be in homeostasis, in balance, and to process out the things that no longer serve and to bring in more of that universal life force, energy, so that you're functioning and flowing in literal alignment.

Speaker 2: 43:41

So I was going to ask about that, like in terms of the alignment. You're doing a session, I'm imagining that your hands feel like magnets, right, like if you know when two poles that are the same push against each other. I don't know what it feels like, but if it did, and that then you can feel where energy needs, where it's stuck and where it needs to move. Is that right?

Speaker 1: 44:04

I think that when we get you to be a Reiki practitioner, that's how you might feel it. Everyone feels it differently. Some people feel heat, some people feel cold, some people don't feel anything at all Interesting. That doesn't mean it's not happening. That just means that you're not feeling it, it's your mind isn't allowing it at that time, okay.

Speaker 1: 44:29

But what I? So, even as the receiver, you might feel it differently. Okay, some people see colors, some people see shapes. So I'm, I'm, married to a wonderful, wonderful man who couldn't be any more on the side of conventional science, and so when I started getting into all of this, it's I don't know if you do remember the TV show Dharma and Greg. That's going to date.

Speaker 2: 44:54

You get the idea.

Speaker 1: 44:55

I'm literally Dharma, right, and he's Greg and um, he's been supporting me throughout all of this, but not really wanting to participate, until one day our power goes out until once upon a time, divinely, our power goes out.

Speaker 1: 45:12

We're both working from home and everything that he does is via screens and technology. And so he pops up and he's like hey, what are you doing, want to hang out? And I'm like, I have things that I'm doing. You know I'm doing. But my table was out because I had just seen a client and I said do you want a session? And he was open, cool, and we did a session and the whole time, jen, my ego is like, oh my gosh, he's going to be like you need to get back to public education. This isn't working. What is this? You know all of these things. And after we did the session, he shared that he had a vision. He saw colors. He felt tingling in his body.

Speaker 1: 45:51

Now, he hasn't asked for a session since then. Um, well, that's not true. There have actually been a couple of times we've done some work when he's had some physical ailments. Uh, but it was so wild because you just don't know. You just don't know, um, but the most powerful thing is getting back to that.

Speaker 1: 46:10

It's this subconscious healing, and one of the greatest gifts that I was able to provide for several clients is they were doing the deep work of either EMDR or there's another therapy called brain spotting, and by coming to me for the Reiki sessions, we were able to create an energetic container, because it's really unfair that we have these services, like these deep therapies that are accessible, but yet you go in and then what? You're just supposed to go back into rush hour traffic, into taking care of your children, into doing your high pressure, high power job. So I love creating containers because we don't always necessarily have the tools to access what we need when our energy is just being depleted and you need that container in order to have that safety and that security for the healing to really happen and the transformation to be happening.

Speaker 2: 47:11

Having so many thoughts right now. I've been lately having this um, I don't even know if I would call it an experience, but just for me personally, you know, the whole masculine, feminine thing started with me thinking about, like how can I be more feminine? So, so a man, a masculine, can hold space for me. And now is not my time to date. Now is not my time to be in a relationship. Maybe it will be soon in this season. I'm having this really cool experience of and I didn't, I'm not even trying to do it, it's just happening where I feel that there's a, that I'm creating a container because I am wholly both. You know we all have both thin us. So I'm creating a container that feels really safe for things.

Speaker 2: 47:57

So the episode I did on Mary Magdalene and just that experience that I had on the grief coming up, it was a such an interesting experience to to sort of witness myself, holding space for myself for the grief to come up and move through, right. So when you talk about this, it feels like a communal way to do that, right. Yep, some for somebody else to be a witness, to hold space, create a channel for things to move, and it's so. Woo of me, but the word that I've been using lately is just really to alchemize it and and so much of that has gotten stuck in us generationally but even in our own lifetimes that to move it. That's why I was asking about like, can you feel the energy move? Where does it move from and where does it move to and what happens to it? Because I I have an experience of what it feels like in my body, where it feels like my heart chakra is where things alchemize, things move up and through, and it's like this is a center that, like chain, transforms it. Does that make sense?

Speaker 1: 49:02

A hundred percent. Your heart is the center of your energy centers, okay, and it's related to all things emotional and energy processing. And your heart, you know the word. You're extremely courageous for doing all of this and for creating these containers. And the word, the word courage, the root Kerr, means heart.

Speaker 2: 49:26

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1: 49:29

So we often think that it's like courage is the warrior going to battle and really it's the mama. I love that, holding the space that's take strength that is beyond the physical. That's true courage. And leading and doing that work in this time of volatility where it's absolutely necessary and needed. But that and you are not alone, that is the other thing. That light is within all of us and it is being ignited in all different pockets and faiths and areas. And that is incredible and it's needed to be known, because it can feel so lonely, especially in the world of social media and access. And when the true cowards come out, true cowards come out.

Speaker 2: 50:30

Yeah, and I'll think you know I think about that Like I've I've been. Well, it kind of comes back to the point we made about we can. Either we can feed either wolf, and I've been in that place of judgment or cowardice, or inability to even look outside of my own way of thinking. I would fear, really fear, if I, if I did, what would happen and how could things crumble and and they kind of did, but it was all for the better, I mean, it was all for the betterment of it.

Speaker 1: 51:01

But Well, when you say that, Jen, I just want to affirm that I was in that space probably 10 minutes ago and an hour before that. One of the pieces is for me, is developing self-awareness, to constantly be realigning and to create that space through practices like meditation, like mindfulness, mindful eating, right, that are really allowing me to be present and creating space so that I can respond versus react, yeah, and that I'm in the driver's seat versus the fear. Yeah, cause it really is only fear or love, but fear is going to come up, judgment's going to come up for human, yeah.

Speaker 2: 51:49

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 51:49

And it's. It's ineffective, and I'm very careful with the language that I use because I've worked so long to be purposeful in my intentions around living my life in alignment, and it doesn't mean that I always show up the best, especially as a mother. Oh my gosh, you mean?

Speaker 2: 52:08

we have a perfect moment, yeah.

Speaker 1: 52:10

But creating enough space to respond versus react, and then getting back to that F word forgiveness and forgiveness of self is the hardest. And when I work with clients whether it's on balancing their body with you know, learning about macros or on a meditation practice, whatever it might be we immediately talk about the most uncomfortable place to be is knowing what you quote, unquote should be doing because you're no longer unconscious. When you're unconscious and unskilled it's not a big deal you don't know, you don't know what you don't know. But as you start becoming conscious and you realize, oh my gosh, I'm unskilled, that's uncomfortable. But it's nowhere near as uncomfortable as when you are conscious and you have the skills and you still aren't doing them. Yeah, because there's things that are pre-programmed, and that gets back into as when you are conscious and you have the skills and you still aren't doing them. Yeah, because there's things that are pre-programmed, and that gets back into. How we really embody resilience and becoming well in your entire life is by continuing to commit to growth, and growth means learning, and it's harder to unlearn than it is to learn the first time. So so many of our patterns and other things are literally embedded. Our synaptic connections are so strong and so rooted that it takes practice and practice and practice to create enough space to then rewire them.

Speaker 1: 53:51

My favorite phrase that I coined in the math classroom but I use, it's like your buckle up buttercup, which I use with my eight-year-old all the time. It's so, so wonderful, but also with her I use this phrase and I use it with my clients and myself. Practice makes permanent. It's a misnomer that practice makes perfect. We are not perfect. We're human Right. You're always somebody's gonna mess up, no matter how many times you practice. But practice does make permanent. It makes those synaptic connections, so it becomes muscle memory and you then there's a. There's a falsehood that we can multitask. It's not multitasking, it's that you become so skilled in one area that less attention needs to be there, so that you then can quickly shift your attention to something else, creating those autonomic responses, automaticity in what it is and you know, in choosing a food that is in alignment with the outcome that you want for your mood and for your body, or that's in a thought pattern that allows you to show up as the person that you truly are designed to be, it takes practice.

Speaker 2: 55:07

So I want to circle back in that, to talk about our internal thought pattern and tie it back to the forgiveness piece. I don't know why I'm hanging on that. I think it's important for some reason today, or for whomever's listening, of course it's important. I just think a lack of forgiveness of self is one of the biggest things that's holding people back from really living in their power and really waking up. And you know, as I've thought about what if I was going to teach a class, or what if I was going to what course would I write?

Speaker 2: 55:36

And I look back at my different chapters and seasons in life before I could even go into I'm going to call it the dark night of the soul.

Speaker 2: 55:44

But before I could go into the depth of the stuff I needed to go into, like to me, there's this cycle, right, there's the dark night of the soul. But before I could go into the depth of the stuff I needed to go into, like to me, there's this cycle, right, there's the dark dark night of the soul. Or, for I'll just use the grief of my dad passing, that was a darkness, but I don't mean dark like scary dark, I just mean deep that comes before the coming getting out and then there's a shedding. That happens. But even before that in my I can see a pattern in my life before I went into the dark night of the soul, there was usually a point of stuckness and and I can see some scenarios that there was a lack of self-forgiveness or shame a lack of forgiveness or shame or guilt, right, they're all closely tied and I've thought through, like, how would I help somebody else?

Speaker 2: 56:37

How do you? How do you forgive? How do you forgive self? How do you overcome shame and guilt? How do you move through that? Cause that I think, when you get that unlock, you're off to the races. Who knows what the process looks like, but I think that's a huge unlock. So how would you? How would you coach somebody through self-forgiveness or shame or guilt?

Speaker 1: 57:03

Well, it would be not a singular conversation right, yeah, it's not a one and done no and it's something that I'm continuously working on, especially being a person who is resilient and holds myself to high expectations and is growth minded. There also is a time for rest and just allowing the imperfection. Yes, thank you for saying that. Yeah, and so you're doing it right now. You are actively doing the process right now by sharing and listening. I am doing the process right now by sharing, by normalizing, by normalizing that it's okay to not know, it's okay to not be okay. What's the only thing that's unacceptable is continuing to, to not shift, to allow yourself to just exist in the things that you know are not serving your highest self. There's a difference between rest and being able to process than there is just like giving up and letting it go and saying why not?

Speaker 2: 58:17

Why do you think people allow themselves to stay in that space, to stay in the space of being stuck yeah, stuck or unforgiveness. Or knowing better I'm air quoting here, but like knowing better but not doing better that conscious and aware and skilled and not. Why do you think people? Or knowing better no, I'm air quoting here, but like knowing better but not doing better. That that conscious and aware and skilled and not. Why do you think people? It's uncomfortable, yeah.

Speaker 1: 58:37

And it's counter-cultural. And it gets back to the community. Hmm, what if the thing that you're working on is going to take you out of the only community that makes you feel safe?

Speaker 2: 58:52

I think you can speak, yeah yeah, but I think you're right about the countercultural piece in general, like there's a lot more out there now, especially with social media, I suppose, about growth and stuff. But I think for me and I'm in the woo world now turns turns out I'm here, but even if I wasn't, I think that there is. I was just talking to a friend yesterday about that. Like he was like Jen, not everybody wants to have conversations that are vulnerable, you know that Right, and I was like I totally like did not respond well, cause I was like that's your, that's your self-talk, that's not my world. And he challenged me on it and he's like no, but that is not everybody's, not everybody comfortable with that. And for for me to be in a position to encourage people to be comfortable with vulnerability. He was saying this is vulnerable for him, right, because it is counter-cultural. All of this is, but you do have to face the fears, I think, of being labeled certain ways or being left being sort of exiled in small and large ways. That it's real.

Speaker 1: 1:00:05

It is, and it also I. Small talk is very hard for me, but yet it's necessary, and one of my greatest gifts is also one of my greatest challenges, which is the vulnerability and the depth. It's tiring, yeah, and so there it's. Just like the masculine and the feminine, we need both. We need both and we also need to recognize that as a culture, we are fairly emotionally immature and there is a huge lack as a culture around ritual, especially coming of age, and we have a lot of adults who at least have aged into adulthood, that are still operating with extreme immaturity. And we grow up.

Speaker 1: 1:01:00

We were here in Minnesota, yeah, I didn't grow up here. Yeah, when I came here and I heard Minnesota, nice, I thought, oh, everyone's going to be nice to me, right, nice can be very just, passive, aggressive and a way to make it very surface. When somebody asked me, how are you? I'm like wow, we're starting with the hard questions already, you know. I mean, do you really want to know? I want to know, yeah, and can I even really answer that? Because it's, it's in awareness, it's, you know, changing and I'm navigating it all the time. But, um, I want to value. Wherever anyone is at, we are all exactly where we need to be and we exist on a spectrum in all things and we move not just in seasons but in moments. That's the science of the quantum field and how things are responding, and it's okay to be uncomfortable and to need to take a step away from something. That doesn't mean just because you're not actively engaged in it that it isn't impacting.

Speaker 2: 1:02:14

Yeah, okay, may I reflect some things back to you please?

Speaker 1: 1:02:18

Oh my goodness, yes yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:02:21

Um, I think it is really like I'm just getting to know you. We didn't do a lot of surface talk. We met on zoom and dove right in. We had dinner the other night and dove right in. And here we are again and I'm so thankful for that, thank you. Like we could have been friends for years and maybe we have been in another lifetime, who knows. You know, it just feels like a really great connection.

Speaker 2: 1:02:47

But you, um, you really do hold a really beautiful space and seeing. It was fun to go out with you and see the way that you interacted with the lift drivers and people know like that, know you probably have seen you do this. But just getting in and what is your name and how are you and and meeting people in the eye, and part of what I think and I don't I'm getting to know you, but part of what I, what I'm valuing valuing in you or seeing in you is your ability to connect the connect the dots between people, between people and with different lenses. So we you know we've talked about religion and Reiki and science and all of these different pieces. I have felt only love from you and care and space sharing and no, let me help her figure this thing out, or let me fix this thing, or let me impose my you can.

Speaker 2: 1:03:56

You have created so much resonance and no dissonance. That's a good part of your work, but I feel that and then, what a gift that is for groups of people, for individuals, for your family, for the community, and I don't. I imagine that shows up in your work with, with everybody. But there's something really unique about that, and what other people would call your networking ability. I'm like, oh my gosh, you're the person that knows somebody for everything. But you're not just a resource giver, you are a true connector and bridge builder is what it feels like to me.

Speaker 1: 1:04:33

Wow, thank you.

Speaker 2: 1:04:34

Yeah, it's really beautiful.

Speaker 1: 1:04:37

Thank you, yeah, and in true vulnerability. It's very uncomfortable for me to hear that, really why? Because we're all working on our things and I am working on being able to celebrate all of me, even just being able to celebrate.

Speaker 2: 1:04:54

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:04:55

But there's also part of me that feels so proud because to be able to look back and know this deeper, knowing that my whole life was shaped by such significant pain and yet it's always been love. And that's how I honor my mother and my father, who it's still very, very raw for me and he was the greatest love of my life. And I get to show up for my daughter, my little miracle girl. But I get to show up for every single stranger, because this life is so precious, why not? Why not? And knowing how precious life is, to be able to approach it as if, because we don't know what's going to happen. But if today was my last that I could rest easy and, jen, I could I honestly could.

Speaker 2: 1:06:11

Oh my heart, Robin. Thank you. Thank you, Jen, hey you, yes you. Thank you for tuning in today. I hope this episode is supporting you on your path to becoming the strongest, shiniest version of you. My goal and hope is to continue helping people through this podcast. So if you've enjoyed this episode or taken anything that's helped you out, the best thank you would be to join me in moving this forward by doing two simple things. If you haven't already, following the podcast is very helpful. Also, apparently, the algorithms really like reviews. If you can take a minute to leave a review, artificial intelligence would love it and I would be so grateful. Feel free, of course, to share an episode with someone who you think may need to hear what you heard today. Thanks again, everyone. I genuinely appreciate you and I'm so thankful to be building a community like this together here. I'll catch you later. In the meantime, have a banging day.